When I (Marie) was 24 years old, my father passed away. The months following this event have probably been the hardest, most emotional of my entire life.
Losing someone you love and have known since the day you were born is hurtful and feels completely surreal. Events like this can really mess with your mind and cause damage to your mental health without you even realising it.
As with any other event in life that throws you off course, you eventually learn to deal with it and move on. I certainly did, too – but the scars in my heart are still there. Up until this day.
I never thought that I would ever be the kind of person to admit that I am struggling and actively ask for help. All I wanted during this time was to feel understood, heard, seen, felt. Supported. Less lonely with my pain.
When I fell in love for the first time, I brought a lot of emotional pain into this relationship.
The fear of losing someone I love has haunted me since the day my father left us, and losing my back-then boyfriend felt simply horrible. Feeling attachment towards someone isn’t healthy, but I couldn’t help it.
I needed someone to have my back, hold space for me and let me know that they would never leave. Which was exactly what happened after 5 years of being together.
In 2016, one year after my dad had passed away, I started working with a Life Coach, Erica, who helped me gain clarity on a lot of past traumas that had manifested into my physical reality back then.